I don’t even know what this movie is. I expected it to be a thriller based on the trailers, but that isn’t really accurate. There isn’t any suspense or a central conflict or really even a villain. It doesn’t have enough of a perspective to be a satire. I guess it’s a drama, though it […]
Annabelle is the prequel to The Conjuring that explains the origin of the evil doll. Annabelle: Creation is the prequel to Annabelle that explains the origin of the evil doll. So right off the bat, this thing just exudes necessity. I have been searching through the encyclopedia of film knowledge in my head and […]
I’ve been looking forward to The Belko Experiment for awhile. The trailers promised some great actors in an absurd plot (summarized in the trailer quite nicely as “Battle Royale meets Office Space”) that looked like the kind of violent exploitation flick that rarely makes it to theaters anymore. In other words, it looked right […]
As a connoisseur of cinematic trainwrecks, I have really been looking forward to this film. For the uninitiated, The Disaster Artist is the true story of the making of one of the most notoriously awful movies ever made: The Room. I fucking love The Room. I have probably watched it more than a dozen […]
The Dark Tower is Stephen King’s magnum opus, an eight-volume sprawling epic that spans thousands of pages, connects in some way with most of his other novels and makes The Lord of the Rings look like a short story. It is also a very complex story that crosses into multiple worlds, timelines and perspectives […]
I have never been a big fan of M. Night Shyamalan, but I was pleasantly surprised by his last film, The Visit. That movie was a batshit crazy blend of horror and comedy, the tone of which I liken to a lost episode of Tales from the Crypt stretched out to feature length (I […]
This is going to be a long one, folks, because I’m not happy. Following his excellent appearance in Captain America: Civil War, the cleverly titled Spiderman: Homecoming is the web-slinger’s true introduction into the Marvel Universe where he belongs. For those that don’t follow movie industry shenanigans, there is a reason why this took […]
I seem to be in the minority with this series because I don’t hate any of the previous installments. Sure, the first one is easily the best. Yeah, they are all too long and the fourth one felt forced and unnecessary. But none of the previous sequels particularly bothered me; they are just harmless […]
I honestly can’t believe that I’m saying this, but Power Rangers is pretty good. I was fully prepared to hate this film. I had pre-planned a bunch of jokes for this review and now I can’t use a goddamned one of them. I hated the trailers for this, as they did the film a […]
So these things are still being made. The sixth film in the series adapting the classic video game franchise, Resident Evil: The Final Chapter has us again following our hero Alice (who isn’t in the games) as she returns to the Hive (which isn’t in the games) for a final battle with Dr. Isaacs […]