The Doctor’s Diagnosis: F It goes without saying that Francis Ford Coppola is one of the most revered directors of all time, primarily for what is arguably the greatest 4-movie streak of any director in film history (The Godfather, The Conversation, The Godfather Part 2 and Apocalypse Now). His filmography is, at best, inconsistent […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B I had no idea what to expect going into this movie, which is fitting since I couldn’t have possibly predicted how bonkers it is. The Substance is a balls-to-the-wall, batshit crazy, Cronenberg-esque extravaganza of body horror. It’s a bit too long and the social commentary has the subtlety of Cannibal […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C Speak No Evil is a remake of the Danish film of the same name from 2022. It may seem unnecessary to remake a movie from just two years ago and, yes, I wouldn’t necessarily call this movie “necessary.” However, I was genuinely wondering how this material would be updated for […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D The original Beetlejuice is a classic and arguably one of the most original films released by a major studio since the 1970s. It’s a movie that I’ve probably watched a couple dozen times and I have fond memories of the cartoon from when I was a kid. Given the film’s […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: F There was a time, not long ago, when the Blumhouse logo in front of a movie didn’t make me groan and regret my life choices. The Black Phone was my favorite movie of 2022 and the 2020 version of The Invisible Man is a great movie. That was only a […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: F I seem to be in the minority on this, but I am not, in principle, opposed to the idea of a new Crow movie. Yes, the original movie is intrinsically and tragically tied to Brandon Lee’s legacy. However, one must consider two things: First, there have already been three terrible […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C+ After the debacle of Alien: Covenant, I had completely written off the Alien franchise and didn’t pay much attention to the development of this latest entry. Despite its longevity, this is a series that has purely lived off the quality of its first two entries for a long, long time. […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D- My trip to the theater to see Trap marked the 10th anniversary of when I started going to the movies every week back in August 2014, when this compulsion all started with the godawful Michael Bay reboot of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. A lot has happened in the last ten […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B+ Marvel Jesus, indeed. Deadpool & Wolverine has arrived to resuscitate the Marvel Universe, the once unstoppable juggernaut that has been on life support in recent years due to a string of critical and commercial flops (with the exception of the excellent Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3). The enormous box […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B I honestly didn’t have particularly high hopes going into Twisters. Actually, to put it more bluntly, I didn’t give a shit about this movie from the moment that it was announced. While the original Twister was a massive success back in 1996, I’m still not exactly sure why. It isn’t […]