I’m just a guy that loves movies and loves talking about movies. Actually, that’s a lie. I love a lot of movies and really hate a lot of movies. But, either way, I love talking about them. I’ve been writing movie reviews for years and finally decided to share them because this interweb thing really seems to be taking off. I hope you enjoy my reviews and equally hope that you don’t bother me if you don’t.
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C First of all, it’s tragic that they wasted the Bad Boys for Life title on the third movie in this series. Did they not think that there would be a fourth one? They could have written it as Bad Boys 4 Life and it would have been so damn clever, […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D+ This is a classic example of a concept that seems much cooler on paper than it does in execution. In a Violent Nature is a slasher movie from the perspective of the slasher. More specifically, it is basically like watching a Friday the 13th movie if you were following Jason […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C+ First of all, how am I supposed to pronounce the title of this movie? Is it supposed to be “Godzilla and Kong?” If so, when did “x” start to mean “and?” It isn’t “Godzilla versus Kong” because that was the last movie. Is it a math problem, like “Godzilla Times […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B+ Low expectations can sometimes be a blessing. Based on the trailers, I expected Immaculate to be another jump-scare filled possession movie, the sort that makes up about 90% of modern horror films. In particular, the film looked nearly identical to Prey for the Devil, last year’s shitty jump-scare horror movie […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B- I actually saw Arthur the King before Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire but I’ve been putting off reviewing it because, well, it’s fine. It isn’t great, it isn’t bad, it’s just fine. I mean it’s supposed to be an inspirational movie about a dog and it delivers on that promise. I doubt […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D- I was seemingly one of very few people that hated Ghostbusters: Afterlife, but the trailers made me hopeful for this latest entry. While Afterlife was manipulative nostalgia porn that was completely beholden to the original Ghostbusters, Frozen Empire looked to finally be escaping from that film’s shadow and seemed inspired by […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: F I’ll be honest, I’m running out of ways to say the same things about these horrendous PG-13 horror movies. I could just take my review of Night Swim or Five Nights at Freddy’s, change some nouns and repost it and it would essentially be the same thing. Like those films, […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D+ I’ve been putting off writing this review because, contrary to popular belief, I don’t like being “that guy.” I don’t like being that one guy that trashes something that everyone else loves. I’ve spent the last five days reading the almost universally positive reviews for Dune: Part Two and trying […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D Drive-Away Dolls is the first solo directorial effort from Ethan Coen, one half of the legendary filmmaking duo the Coen Brothers. When Ethan combined with Joel Coen, the Coen Brothers brought us such films as Miller’s Crossing, Fargo, The Big Lebowski and No Country for Old Men. The brothers semi-retired […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D When most people saw the trailer for Madame Web, they collectively asked the same question: What the fuck is this? That includes star actress Dakota Johnson, who quit her talent agency when the trailer was released. Having now seen the film, I can’t answer that question, but I can add […]