I’m just a guy that loves movies and loves talking about movies. Actually, that’s a lie. I love a lot of movies and really hate a lot of movies. But, either way, I love talking about them. I’ve been writing movie reviews for years and finally decided to share them because this interweb thing really seems to be taking off. I hope you enjoy my reviews and equally hope that you don’t bother me if you don’t.
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D Following Fast X, The Boogeyman and now Transformers: Rise of the Beasts, the cinematic theme of summer 2023 seems to be movies that are unable to meet even the lowest of expectations. Like Fast X and The Boogeyman, I wasn’t expecting the latest Transformers to be a good movie (does anyone […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D- I’ve spent a lot of time ranting about my hatred of modern PG-13 horror movies in last few years. Despite my vehement dislike of these movies, I thought that I had become accustomed to this garbage. However, something about The Boogeyman broke my brain. I don’t know if it was […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B- Since I go to the movies every week, Sanctuary provided a valuable service in my life by giving me something other than the remake of The Little Mermaid to see in this particular week. I had somewhat resigned myself to seeing the latest entry in Disney’s trend of self-desecration before this […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: F I’ve seen worse movies than Fast X in the last couple of years. I’ve certainly seen movies that pissed me off more than Fast X did. Halloween Ends does exist, after all. But rarely do movies leave me feeling as empty inside as Fast X did. Not since Grown Ups […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D Hypnotic, a new film from director Robert Rodriguez, is just a mess. In a way, though, it’s an intriguing mess. This film starts as a fairly entertaining cop thriller and then goes off the frigging rails with so many plot twists that I couldn’t remember how the movie started by the […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: A- I had pretty much given up on the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Ever since Avengers: Endgame, these movies have ranged from mediocre to awful, with the majority of them leaning closer to the latter. Even though the original Guardians of the Galaxy is my favorite MCU movie, I was completely indifferent […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: A- Sisu is the latest entry in the currently popular action subgenre of “don’t mess with a normal looking guy because he might actually be a complete badass and slaughter you.” This oddly specific subgenre is typified by Nobody and the John Wick movies and the trailers even spotlighted this connection […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C+ I love the original Evil Dead trilogy and it’s a very unique trilogy for a couple of reasons. First, the tone varies wildly between films. The original The Evil Dead is a straight horror film, Evil Dead 2 is a horror comedy (and, by a slim margin, my favorite entry) […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D Much like superhero movies, I should have a stock review template for possession horror movies. This is my least favorite horror subgenre because filmmakers have done nothing interesting with it since The Exorcist. All genres and subgenres have tropes, certainly, but few kinds of movies are as beholden to an oddly […]
The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B+ As much as I love fantasy movies, I don’t know much about Dungeons & Dragons. I’ve seen the awful movie from 2000 and its two sequels (which also aren’t particularly good, but fun in a Saturday afternoon television, Hercules and Xena kind of way), but I’ve never played the board […]