This is shockingly awful. Let me start by saying that I don’t like Clint Eastwood. I fucking love Clint Eastwood. I love him as an actor, I love him as a director. He is one of the most iconic figures in the history of Hollywood and perhaps the most iconic such figure still working. […]
It’s time to travel back to a magical time called the mid-90s. It was a time when video stores supplied our weekend entertainment, TLC warned us of the dangers of waterfalls and Dunkaroos were plentiful. It was also a time when the indie movie scene exploded, largely thanks to Quentin Tarantino and Kevin Smith. […]
Yeah, I’m back. I’ve been travelling a lot for the last month and haven’t had time to write reviews. Rest assured, I have found time to keep on my movie schedule and did see Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, Sicario: Day of the Soldado, Antman & the Wasp and Skyscraper. To summarize those films: meh, […]
Short of Charles Bronson, Liam Neeson may be the most unlucky bastard in the history of Hollywood. No matter what this man is doing, its almost inevitable that his family will be kidnapped and he will have to fuck shit up. That is a really stressful way to go through life. The Commuter is […]
Are you excited for a sequel to a so-so horror movie from ten years ago? Hell yeah, you’re not. Seriously, I’m amazed that this movie exists, let alone that it was given a nationwide theatrical release. Classic horror franchises like Child’s Play, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Hellraiser have been relegated to direct-to-DVD hell, but […]
Prior to seeing this film, I only had a vague notion of what Slender Man is. After seeing this film, I only have a vague notion of what Slender Man is. Seriously, I don’t know what the fuck this movie is about. This movie is so bad that Sony tried to get out of […]
Overlord is not what I was expecting. Based on the trailers, I expected a goofy, over-the-top horror/comedy in the vein of Evil Dead 2 or Demon Knight. Instead, the closest comparison that I can make is From Dusk till Dawn. Not in terms of plot, but in the sense that this is basically two […]
2018 has finally given us a decent remake of Death Wish and it isn’t the remake of Death Wish. Peppermint isn’t actually just a copy of Death Wish (or a million other vigilante movies), but somehow remakes the entire Death Wish series. I’ve noted before that that series starts with a somber, serious film […]
What the hell is Phoenix Forgotten, you ask? Well, dear reader, that is a great question. I had never heard of this movie until it appeared on the release schedule a couple of weeks ago. I never saw a single trailer or commercial for it. It features a cast of unknowns, is from a […]
Rampage is stupid, but it’s a good kind of stupid. I vaguely remember playing the arcade game as a kid (and played the updated version at Dave & Buster’s about a month ago) and was curious about how a movie would work since the game has little plot. In the game, you select one […]