Yes, this will be spoiler-free. I generally avoid reading reviews of a film before I have seen it myself and written my own review. The most that I will do, when I’m particularly curious, is scroll through the blurbs on Rotten Tomatoes when I’m having my pre-movie burger and beer. But, this being Star […]
The Dark Tower is Stephen King’s magnum opus, an eight-volume sprawling epic that spans thousands of pages, connects in some way with most of his other novels and makes The Lord of the Rings look like a short story. It is also a very complex story that crosses into multiple worlds, timelines and perspectives […]
So these things are still being made. The sixth film in the series adapting the classic video game franchise, Resident Evil: The Final Chapter has us again following our hero Alice (who isn’t in the games) as she returns to the Hive (which isn’t in the games) for a final battle with Dr. Isaacs […]
Life sucks. Now that I’ve gotten that obvious line out of the way, let’s get something else out of the way: Life is an Alien ripoff. A damn blatant one too. Now, I’m not particularly averse to ripoffs. I love slasher movies and they are all ripoffs of Black Christmas. I rented many […]
Transformers: The Last Knight is a giant middle finger to filmmaking and the whole of human civilization. I have never walked out of a movie, but this joins a very short list of films that made me seriously consider doing so. Not everyone in my theater made it to the end. We lost some […]
I was looking forward to Valerian. Not because I found it particularly appealing, but just because it is the unicorn of the modern film industry: a big-budget original movie. Yeah, it’s based on some old French comics, but that’s close enough to original in a year when I’ve seen the 8th Fast & Furious, […]
This being the 9th Planet of the Apes film, I’m continually amazed by the mileage that 20th Century Fox has squeezed out of this concept. However, this is a rare instance when I prefer the reboot series over the original series. Rise of the Planet of the Apes is my favorite of the franchise […]
Ghost in the Shell is based on a Japanese comic book/anime series that started in the late 80s. I haven’t read the comics or seen the anime and I wish that I had because then I might have something more to say here. The hardest movies to review are mediocre ones because they don’t […]
This is the kind of movie that makes me wonder how studio executives got their jobs. Geostorm was originally filmed in 2014 but had disastrous test screenings in 2015. So, two years after filming had wrapped, the studio brought in a new director and producer to oversee extensive reshoots, resulting in some characters being […]
Flatliners is the kind of remake that I’m not, in theory, opposed to seeing. While the 1990 film is decent, there is ample room for improvement. The original has a strong concept, but did little with it and was overly serious (even though the sight of Kiefer Sutherland repeatedly getting his ass kicked by […]