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2023 Horror

The Exorcist: Believer

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D-                Last October, director David Gordon Green gave us one of the worst horror sequels ever made with Halloween Ends. This October, Green returns with another one of the worst horror sequels ever made with The Exorcist: Believer. If anything positive can come of this ridiculously misguided film, it’s my hope […]

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2023 Horror

Saw X

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B+                First, a brief tangent: Why is everyone pronouncing the title of this movie as “Saw Ex,” as in pronouncing the letter “X?” This is the tenth Saw movie, so pronounce it as “Saw Ten.” When Saw XI inevitably arrives, are we going to refer to it as “Saw Ex Eye?” […]

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2023 Horror

It Lives Inside

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D+                I feel like I review this movie five or six times a year. The feature film debut of Indian American director Bishal Dutta, It Lives Inside attempts to inject horror characters from Hindu and Buddhist mythologies into modern horror. That’s not a bad idea and could introduce a new slate […]

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2023 Horror

The Nun II

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D                This is the ninth Conjuring universe movie and I think we’re at the point where we can all agree that this just needs to end. I’ve never been a big fan of this franchise, but the last few entries have made the earlier films look like downright masterpieces in comparison. […]

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2023 Horror

Insidious: The Red Door

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D                Insidious: The Red Door breaks the tradition of odd-numbered Insidious films being any good. Following the last two entries that serves as prequels to the original movie, The Red Door finally provides a sequel to Insidious: Chapter 2. However, Chapter 2, which was essentially an unnecessary and prolonged epilogue to […]

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2023 Horror

The Boogeyman

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D-                I’ve spent a lot of time ranting about my hatred of modern PG-13 horror movies in last few years. Despite my vehement dislike of these movies, I thought that I had become accustomed to this garbage. However, something about The Boogeyman broke my brain. I don’t know if it was […]

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2023 Horror

Evil Dead Rise

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: C+                I love the original Evil Dead trilogy and it’s a very unique trilogy for a couple of reasons. First, the tone varies wildly between films. The original The Evil Dead is a straight horror film, Evil Dead 2 is a horror comedy (and, by a slim margin, my favorite entry) […]

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2023 Horror

The Pope’s Exorcist

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D               Much like superhero movies, I should have a stock review template for possession horror movies. This is my least favorite horror subgenre because filmmakers have done nothing interesting with it since The Exorcist. All genres and subgenres have tropes, certainly, but few kinds of movies are as beholden to an oddly […]

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2023 Horror

Scream VI

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: B-               I seem to be in the minority with my dissatisfaction with the fifth Scream film and, consequently, I wasn’t particularly hyped for Scream VI. However, as with Creed III, I’m happy to say that I was moderately pleasantly surprised. While this entry is still far from the best sequel (let alone […]

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2023 Horror

Children of the Corn

The Doctor’s Diagnosis: D+                Despite the simple title, it’s important to note that this is the eleventh Children of the Corn movie. I’ll repeat that because I think it warrants repeating: This is the fucking eleventh Children of the Corn movie. When I mentioned this movie to people, I mainly got shocked looks and […]