I’m just a guy that loves movies and loves talking about movies. Actually, that’s a lie. I love a lot of movies and really hate a lot of movies. But, either way, I love talking about them. I’ve been writing movie reviews for years and finally decided to share them because this interweb thing really seems to be taking off. I hope you enjoy my reviews and equally hope that you don’t bother me if you don’t.
I love a good whodunit. I’m a big fan of Agatha Christie’s novels, Clue is one of my all-time favorite movies and the idea of a bunch of rich people sitting around a parlor and drinking brandy as they are systematically bumped-off just speaks to me for some reason. What the fuck is a […]
For the second consecutive week, I’m reviewing something that most people probably don’t know is a remake of a foreign film. Cold Pursuit is a remake of the 2014 Norwegian film titled In Order of Disappearance and, unlike Miss Bala, it sticks so close to the original film that it really doesn’t even need […]
Keanu Reeves is back to fuck shit up in the latest John Wick film and I’m damn happy to see him. I love these movies. John Wick films remind me of the fun and unabashedly violent actions films that I grew up with, the kind of thing that would have starred Stallone or Schwarzenegger […]
I am about to unload a dump truck of hate onto this movie. I also love this story. Both the novel and the 1990 miniseries had a major impact on me as a kid. I’ve read the book twice and still enjoy the 1990 version despite its flaws. I didn’t love Chapter 1 of […]
Have you ever seen Cube? It’s an interesting sci-fi thriller from 1997 that I remember renting in middle school. I probably haven’t seen it since I was a teenager, but remember that it was about a group of strangers that find themselves locked in a building and must solve a series of puzzles and […]
As much as I love The Shining, I’m not sure if we needed a sequel nearly 40 years later. Having read the book Doctor Sleep, I think that even Stephen King may agree with me. While the book is entertaining, it is also a simple rewrite away from having nothing to do with The […]
I was planning to entertain myself by seeing how many “this feels familiar” jokes I could cram into this review, but I can’t even do that. The original Happy Death Day is a horror version of Groundhog Day in which Tree, our idiotically named hero, must repeatedly relive the same day and be continually […]
“This is the bed of lies!!!!” Trust me, this movie is worth seeing just for that line. You will thank me later. This movie is awful and I am recommending the hell out of it. I may not like a lot of the movies that I see lately, but there are two kinds of […]
Not counting public domain characters (like Dracula, Tarzan, Robin Hood, etc.), Godzilla is the world’s longest-running film series. This is the 35th Godzilla movie (!) and you bet your sweet ass that I’ve seen all of them. The good news is that this is easily the best American-made Godzilla movie. The bad news is […]
Well, this is a big goddam disappointment. Glass is a sequel to both Unbreakable and Split and, since Unbreakable came out in 2000, M. Night Shyamalan has had 19 years to think about how to resolve this series (fun fact: Split was originally just a subplot in Unbreakable, but was cut from the script […]